As the year comes to a close it offers an opportunity to reflect. To think about what has happened in the past 12 months, and if there is any areas of growth to work towards in the new year. However, New Year’s resolutions can be notoriously hard to keep – how many times have you set goals only to let them drift within the first few months?
I’ve spent the majority of my life struggling. I frequently looked around at other classmates or colleagues and wondered why life seemed so much easier for them. When I gradually began to learn why, I realized one of the key differences of more successful people was a healthier perspective than mine. Over time, I’ve learned healthier reframes that have more effectively supported my growth and allowed me to view success more realistically.
Changing your approach to New Year’s resolutions may bring you more success. Let’s explore some simple mental reframes with some favorite words of wisdom from my teachers to help you start the year off right.
1. Lasting success requires a series of baby steps.
“A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.” – Lao-tzu
In my training as a health coach, one of the most important themes we would remind clients, would be “lasting success requires a series of consistent baby steps.” In the US, we expect fast results, but our bodies and subconscious minds are rarely programmed to welcome drastic or sudden changes. There are many strategies to success, you often have to employ enough of them consistently and effectively to reach your goal. This takes time and requires patience and persistence!
2. Life is a series of experiments. Let’s call it “re-search”.
I remember in graduate school, my housemate, Alan Patrick Kenny, MD, Ph.D., came home and told me about having to rerun his experiments again. I remember commenting that he didn’t seem too bothered about it, and he just shrugged and said, “That’s why they call it reeeee-search!”
Life is one big experiment and we are constantly adjusting things to reach our goals. If we approach failures or mistakes as research, it’s a lot easier to take it in our stride, and a great reminder that we just need to adjust or shift gears and try again. As Dr. Alan now tells junior scientists, “If it were easy, they’d call it search!”
3. Don’t be afraid to try new things.
“Insanity is doing the same thing in the same way & expecting a different outcome.” –old Chinese Proverb
If we’ve tried one method long enough and its not working, being open to new ideas and possibilities is a wonderful strategy for success. Even if the original method has worked for many others, it may not be ideal for you. Don’t be afraid to ask your friends or colleagues for new ideas if you’re stuck. And if you need support in implementing the change, do what you can to build an effective support team.
4. Let go of your enemies.
“He who seeks vengeance must dig two graves: one for his enemy and one for himself.” – Chinese proverb
To be angry or vengeful, or obsess about how someone else has wronged you gives them power over you. Until you are able to make peace with the past, others will show up and trigger you.
Changing how you see the person is key to letting go. Here’s one mindset shift that will help you forgive.
5. Let things flow naturally.
Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like. ~ Lao Tzu
This is a great reminder that while its important to have goals, we need to be able to sway and adapt as our environment evolves. When I was younger, I was determined to reach my goals regardless of what the universe was conspiring to tell me. But after too many disappointments, I had to finally accept that the Universe was pointing me elsewhere.
In retrospect, I’m grateful that I listened, because it brought me to a better place. Learning to recognize the signals and reminding myself that sometimes it isn’t meant to be allowed me to better ride the waves in life.
What does success look like for you?
Sometimes its worth redefining what it means to be successful – here are 20 signs you’re succeeding in life even though you don’t think you are that may help.
Do you have any favorite lessons for success in life? If so please share them below!
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